Tag: poetry

Posted in Stories

Beauty

Posted on by palebluefragment

At 9:45 am her phone alarm rings. Beauty looks at me with sleepy eyes and whispers, “morning.” I don’t reply, but I smile and touch her face. It feels soft and pretty. Beauty’s hair is still wet from last night’s beauty shower, where she bathed in orange zest, cinnamon, and moonlight. Beauty washes her face with spring water and gentle breeze. She then moisturizes with La Mer tears-infused balm. She makes a teapot of sunflowers and daisies, waits until it’s lukewarm, chugs her teacup it in one shot and pours me one. “I don’t drink” I say. “It makes butterflies grow inside of my stomach”, she says.

Continue reading “Beauty” →
Posted in Thoughts

Disconnected

Posted on by palebluefragment

Speaking last. Speaking least. Speaking loud. Words won’t come out. Saying too much. Writing more. Writing less. Wanting perfection that doesn’t exist. Is she my friend? Looking above. Clouds touching. Clouds dissipating into clear blue sky. Wanting perfection. Seeking perfection. Unattainable. I won’t be happy. I am happy. Sink within myself. Reject tenderly. Accept the average.

Posted in Thoughts

Prelab

Posted on by palebluefragment

Objective: correct release of unwanted sensations.

Introduction: Showing negative emotions is not cool. Tears are for the pathetic. Sadness must be locked in and hidden three layers under skin: enthusiasm, neutrality, and anguish.

Procedure:

When in solitude, follow the subsequent steps accordingly:

1- slowly peel layers one and two.

Layer one: cool positive outlook on life with an adequate level of mind clarity. Highly socially approved!

Layer two: cool neutral state. A resting bitch face is satisfactory. Mediocre social approval.

Layer three: uncool but true-to-self anguish. Dangerous and leads to social errors. Must remain fully intact for the purpose of this step.

2- activate natural body signals to control the use of layer three. Trust your gut feelings for optimal efficiency.

You’ll observe anguish gushing into tears: A clear soul-cleansing salty liquid. Mmm tastes anguishy!

Don’t calculate the percentage of error. Tear percentage will vary from experiment to another.

3- steadily get out of solitude, rearranging layers one to three. One laying on the surface, three deep underneath. Two in-between. One and two can alternate in case of emergency. Beware of maintaining third layer’s invisibility.

Hazards: tears can lead to a coughing response to clear throat from accumulated phlegm.

Don’t choke on your own tears. Breathe slowly.

References:

“Chemistry of the Uncool Feelings” lab manual, twenty first edition

Posted in Past

Beauty From Pain

Posted on by palebluefragment

I didn’t choose to be me

I didn’t choose having lived a life that numbed me

I didn’t choose to grow up in a fucked up society

absorbing toxic ideals that made me hate religions and traditions

and consider them the source of all evil things

I didn’t choose to let it shape my personality

so viciously

I didn’t choose to be me

feeling so intensely

putting my heart out and feeling empty

over and over

scared of the future

scared of my past scared of myself

I wanted a simple life

a life with no worry

a life where I love and be loved

but how can I be loved if I can’t even introduce myself without wearing my heart out on my sleeve

always been the happy girl the bubbly girl who’s positivity shines through

had I forgotten to be me?

how can I be me?

when I refuse to identify with this malicious part

that’s been unwillingly planted in me

how can I be me?

when I’ve been living in denial for years

and I’d live in denial for years to come

only if it was easy

only if I could sleep and let the sunrise cleanse my soul

let me be

a simple selfless care-free me

living her life without limits

so endlessly

this is who I wanna be

the person who’s emerging from scratch

not the one I buried

hoping one day it’ll turn into ash and dust

but the one who gleams when she speaks and acts and loves…

herself before anyone else

let me be

the one who works hard to inspire

the ones who never stops following her dreams

knowing that it is not too late to learn new things

the one who leads her life in confidence

and never backs down weighed by doubts and fears

the one who believes that it is possible

to grow beauty out of pain